Hello everyone,

 For all the practitioners out there (and non-practitioners), I would love to hear some of the ways you "test" your work, especially for cases where results are not always clear. 

I have posted something on insomnia, for example, and when I'm working on this issue during the day, I have no idea how to test for it, except wait until night-time. 

How would you test your progress if someone came to your office with insomnia, or any other unclear issue (eg: phobias, etc.)? For phobias, if you ask the person to imagine the event/thing that makes them scared, this may not bring up an emotional response - however, when they actually encounter the situation, feelings may arise again. 

Are there any other techniques, apart from visualisation, that people here use to test their progress?

Hello Chim129,

To test on phobias other than by visualisation, and revisiting every aspect of the fear can be tricky, people can take themselvews to the zoo and check how they feel about spiders and snakes for example, they can contemplate booking a flight, etc...and test their fears on a practical way.

I can remember Gwyneth Moss talking about somebody who was scared of enclosed spaces like lifts, straight after the session, she sent her client to the tax office, the only building in their town which had a lift, and the client phoning Gwyneth moss, excitedly reporting this was the third time she went up  and down in the lift....

I guess for insomnia, it has to be a practical testing too, you can re check the issues that you have worked on that you think stop you sleeping...

If the situation arises again, it is important to notice what were your thoughts as you woke up, and during your wake, how you physically felt, etc...

Obviously, there is danger that this process will keep you awake...

Maybe someone else can step in?

 Chim

The main way I test is by getting people to observe any reaction in their body as they think about their issue.  For instance clients with insomnia, I get them to imagine going to bed, and they can start to feel tense.  Once we have worked I just get them to check their body reaction to the same thought.

It might be subtle changes.  Its also how I get people to guage their reaction to a memory. Sometimes they find it hard to put a number or even be aware that they are intense but if you direct them to their body they may feel tension somewhere.  We tend to 'feel' our emotions on a body level.

I always tell my clients there is no difference between imagination and reality.  The brain still thinks imagination is real.  Thats what anxiety is, a reaction to a remembered or imagined event.  So if we can imagine doing something we are much more likely to be able to do it in real life.

Practising in the imagine does work well, but the real test is out there in real life.

When I am working with clients I always end by getting them to imagine themselves a little in the future.  I ask them to be aware what has changed for them, what they can do that they didn't do before, or don't have to do anymore that they did do before.  They are usually aware of being able to see themselves doing something differently and then I often hear back that they went out and found themselves doing it.

The more inventive ways we can find to test the better, so going to a height, putting someone in a cupboard etc is the ultimate test but the imagination really does do fine.

One of my first EFT successes was a woman with a wasp phobia.  It was winter, no wasps.  I asked her to imagine a wasp on the window and her face drained of colour, her shoulders hunched, her fists tightened up.  As we tapped for all possible reasons to be afraid of a wasp she was able to sit totally relaxed, pink and smiling and blown away by EFT as she imagined the wasp again.  She didn't find out until the summer and was amazed to find herself calmly putting a wasp in a jar.  Previously she would have screamed and locked herself in the cupboard until it was removed.  That was the moment her husband believed EFT would work.  We worked on her intense plane phobia as well and totally cleared that before she even got in the plane, only through using her imagination.

To be honest I didn't really GET the power of EFT until I had an amazing session with Philip Davies, who is also on this forum, for trigeminal neuralgia pain (not called the worst pain known to man for nothing, I was literally tearing my hair out with the pain and in a couple of hours with EFT is was gone!).  Once I experienced EFT with an expert I was totally sold.  I had been using it with clients before then but I was not the EFT evangelist then that I am now.  You have to really experience it to believe it and its not always easy to do that alone.

Gill

 Thank you for your kind responses.

From what you have both said, I'm starting to feel like I really need to work on this with somebody else. I have been prescribed anxiety-reducing tablets to help me go to sleep every night, but I do EFT during the day, and try to fall asleep every night without the tablets to see whether it has worked. So far I have had no luck, and have had to continue taking the tablets for sleep. 

My worst fears are getting to a state of dependency with these tablets, which is why I want to rid myself of this problem as soon as possible. 

I am halfway through the process of making an appointment with a professional (we have emailed each other, etc. and have only to agree on a date) - however, I am really apprehensive and doubtful whether it will work. I kind of have the feeling that "if I can't help myself, no one can". Perhaps we have all been there; it's kind of difficult to believe that someone else can pull out what is in your own head. It is also not cheap, so that adds to the worry. I have never seen an EFT professional before, and I know they vary in their level of proficiency, so I really hope I have picked a good one! 

Another thing I am worried about is being able to put what's in my head into words. I am notoriously bad at that. I have been to a psychologist before just trying to get my thoughts into a coherent form, and she just sat there staring at me. 

 On the one hand, I am really optimistic that working with an EFT practitioner will help me tackle the problem much more easily; on the other, I'm afraid to be hopeful in case I get no results. I have heard of people having no luck in their guided EFT sessions. 

 Oh well, to end on a positive note, many thanks, and I will let you know how my session goes! 

 Chim

Does your therapist offer you a free chat first to see if you 'click'. There is nothing set in stone.  Just because you work once with someone doesn't mean you are contracted if you don't feel comfortable. With telephone EFT the world of EFT therapists are available.  This forum is a good place to find one, by reading through the posts and seeing whose approach you feel comfortable with.  Its easy to make cheap calls all over the world these days.  I have clients from Australia to Israel and I live in a tiny little village in Scotland!

The really great thing about EFT is you don't need to be able to put your feelings into exact words, or even tell us anything.  Some of my clients describe their feelings as a shape or a colour.  sometimes I get the whole story, sometimes I have no idea what we have worked on.  As long as you know what your focusing on, any words will do!

I would recommend you read through these, first on how to choose a therapist, and second why its good for us to use a therapist.  I wouldn't be without mine.  I have a collection of them:) And I have been practising EFT for six years.  When I let people help me and allowed myself to be vulnerable with others then I knew I was really on my way to being healed:)

 http://www.emofree.com/Articles2/questions-practitioner.htm

http://www.emofree.com/Articles2/need-eft-practitioner.htm

Please do let us know how you get on.

Gill

Thank you Gill. It is heartening to know that I don't have to "reveal all" to my practitioner; if I am honest, I have to say that one of the reasons I've been reluctant to see a practitioner is wanting to keep certain things private. In my experience of traditional counselling, I think the focus is on letting ALL your feelings out, and I felt uncomfortable and guilty about holding back (even though, at the same time, I was uncomfortable about sharing). Many times the psychologist said, "if you don't tell me what's going on, I can't help you," or words to that effect, which made it even more uncomfortable. 

 It's good to now tht I'll only have to say as much as I feel comfortable saying, and that I can/may still make progress this way. 

Surely it's frustrating for you, however, being in the dark about your client's issue? I sort of have this fear of disappointing/annoying my practitioner by not revealing enough! That probably sounds really odd. 

Hello Chim,

Maybe you could tap on:

Even though I am anxious about taking these tablets because I can't get to sleep,  I deeply love and accept myselfET I am anxious I can't fall asleep naturally, I deeply love and accept myself, ET I am confused about how I really feel, I choose to relax and I deeply love and accept myself.  Points: I am anxious I can't get to sleep, I am afraid I will get addicted to these tablets (1st round) then you can tap on points saying: I send myself insight on this situation (23nd round)

Even though No one can help me, I am in this alone, I am far too complicated to be helped, I am open to the possibility that maybe another person can help me and show me the way to peace. 1sr round: nobody can help me  2nd round: Maybe someone can help me.

When you talk about your worse fear being getting addicted to the tablets, can you identify another fear that resonates with this? What is your real worst fear?

I hope you find peace,

Chim

Our subconcious works wonderfully with metaphors, so if you get a therapist who works in that way he/she will know that changes are going on by the descriptions of the feeling or pain.

We are trained in all sorts of ways to take the edge of the trauma and my clients do not have to tell me a thing a) they don't want to, we can use a code word that means something to them or b) until they are 100% ready to do so.

When I work the only reason I ask someone to tell the story is when they feel they are ready to do so and its ONLY to test that there is nothing there that could still cause intensity.  It is not for my satisfaction or interest.  This isn't like watching a film or a book for entertainment. This is real trauma, real pain and we are very, very sensitive of that.  I never feel the need to intrude on a person and demand to know details and that is what I love about EFT, we can be totally, totally respectful of our clients.

I wouldn't tell a person a thing with that attitude.  Its why talk therapies are so hard, telling someone your darkest feelings is awful.  Sometimes I work for quite a while with the fear of talking about something or terror of feeling something.

We use distancing techniques like imagining putting things in a box or seeing it as a movie.

When you read the case studies on emofree.com you will get a sense of how it can be.  My clients are often absolutely terrified about reopening their painful wounds and are amazed how easy it can be.  I have not had one session yet where we have not ended up laughing, with EFT healing can be fun and light.  

All I ask from my clients is honesty.

That includes saying I do not want to answer that, you are making me angry, I am scared to look at that, I can't feel anything whatever.

There is no such thing as a wrong answer!

Gill

 Thank you Fabienne. I used your advice and tapped on the anxiety about the tablets, and now I am less worried about being dependent on them. But tapping on anxiety around sleeping doesn't seem to work. Oh well, this has been progress. 

 I have also tapped, as per your suggestion, on the fear of allowing someone else to work on me/help me, and my anxiety levels have gone down. I believe there is also a part of guilt over spending that much money on myself as well (for a therapist). 

 Many thanks to you. 

That's good. You can follow your remaining feelings, anything that comes to mind...

About the guilt over spending money on therapy for oneself, I think we all have this at one time or another, it seems such an indulgent thing to do at first. This does not have to be an ongoing expense like talk therapy.  As Gill says, we all need a little help now and again, especially at first.

Your peace of mind is so important, let alone a good night sleep, Even though I feel guilty about spending so much money on myself, I can't possibly deserve it, I am not important enough, I love and accept myself (notice how you feel when you say I love and accept myself - if any thought or feeling comes up, this is material to tap on)

I also think that the fact that you are paying someone is very good, it makes you engage, take responsibility. Do take a look at the posts on choosing a therapist.

Keep us posted.

Fabienne

 Fabienne, you had a good idea - I started to explore the whole issue of spending money on myself, and that has opened up a whole new bunch of "stuff" for me. So even though I feel a bit uncomfortable about the whole money thing, I'm not so uncomfortable that I would want to cancel the appointment. I think I'll work on that later before I become too overwhelmed with issues. 

While I'm waiting for my appointment, I'm trying to do some of it myself. Yesterday I did some relaxation work before performing EFT, and worked on some of the insomnia issues. I could definitely feel a shift. However, last night my insomnia was worse than ever before. On the other hand, I have noticed that the slight fog of depression that has been following me around for the last few weeks (since the insomnia started) has lifted quite a bit. 

I take this as a good sign because it has brought up more issues for me to deal with, and it must mean that I am getting to the deep stuff. Sometimes it gets worse before it gets better :-)

Happy tapping!

Hi Chim,

This is good, sometimes when we have a breakthrough or something clears, it is like finding an old bunch of letters, or going up in the loft, you get all excited, and intriged by what you find, it keeps you "awake", or "there" for hours, you can't ignore the new information (energy), things have to settle down,  but it is great food for growth, nobody said it had to be easy...not that it can't be!

You could tap on:

ET I am opening some boxes I was not aware existed before, I choose to gently and peacefully unravel insight.

Well done for the shifts.

Keep us posted.

Fabienne